When it comes to affairs of the heart, we are all beginners.
Some of us, however, at least speak with authority.
Contact her atDearShonVogue@gmail.comfor your own chance at enlightenment.
Photographed by Arthur Elgort, Vogue, June 2009
Dear Shon,
I am in a happy heterosexual relationship with a man.
We have a lot in common and I love him so much.
I went to twoweddingsof his friends this year, and the experience drained me, both financially and socially.
Both were in the middle of nowhereone abroad and both required time off work.
I spent the weddings awkwardly chatting to the few people I knew and my boyfriend.
Most of the time I found myself sitting in the restroom with a headache.
Im not really a big drinker, and get a lot of social anxiety around new people.
All of the other girlfriends seem to know each other.
I have a feeling they dont really like me.
Sometimes I feel because Im bisexual, I dont really fit in with them.
I feel too weird, too queer, and too quirky in their eyes.
Two of his friends got engaged recently, and I found myself reacting to the news with dread.
We are expecting an invitation to another wedding soon.
Is there any way I can tell my boyfriend I dont want to go?
I feel like a terrible girlfriend.
But I just dont enjoy them.
The ironic thing is, I dont think he enjoys them either.
He just feels like he has to go.
Do I have to suck it up for the man I love?
Hiding in the restroom
Dear Hiding in the Restroom,
I hear you and have been there.
Lets be honest theres only one thing straight people love more thanFriendsandMr.
Brightsideby The Killers and thats attending each others weddings.
Like you, my own social scene had much more varied romantic lives and very different priorities.
Whats stopping you from proposing something you could all do together?
We usually fulfill these out of love and in recognition of the overall benefit the relationship gives us.
