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Depending on who you ask, long-distance relationships are either totally doable or an absolute no-go.
Photo: Yarden Amsalem
Neither party is wrong.
But thats true of any relationship.
One of the secrets to making the situatiom work?
Both partnersbelievingthat it can.
Distance strips a relationship down to its core essence, explains relationship coachSabrina Bendoryof Dating.com.
If a relationship is already shaky, distance can break it.
Does long-distance increase love?
Spending time away from your partner can certainly increase certain feelingsespecially lust.
As famed relationship expertEsther Perelhas said: Desire is rooted in absence and longing.
And the experience of not having increases our wanting.
Bendory underscores the fact that absence can make the heart grow fonderbut only if the foundation is strong.
On the other hand, a lack of consistent in-person affection can present its own challenges in long-distance love.
Below, some tips:
Before you dive into a long-distance relationship, double-check you havethe right mindset.
Long-distance relationships require sacrifice, patience, and commitment, says Bendory.
Do I feel a deep, rare connectionone that I wouldnt easily find elsewhere?
Youll have a lot more success if you go into it clear-eyed.
Honesty and clear expectations are essential for building trust, says dating expertEmma Hathornof Seeking.com.
Be open to hearing what your partner is comfortable with and communicate your own needs as well.
Taking the time to check in with your partner is one simple way to narrow the gap.
Communication should be prioritized, Tenzer says.
However, that doest mean you have to communicate excessively.
Constant communication is not equivalent to a healthier relationship.
The biggest mistake couples make in long-distance relationships is falling into repetitive, surface-level conversations, says Bendory.
Instead, endeavor to go deeper.
Then, remember to actually be present when youaretogether.
It goes without saying, but scheduling time to see each other regularly and frequently is a must.
I recommend engaging in therapy to verify that theres accountability in your partnership, Tenzer says.
If youre in a relationship and still feel emotionally alone, thats a problem, says Bendory.
